Only in my house will you hear...

[azurehart]

PANDA! You had better not be making a long distance phone call young man! Who told you that you could use the phone?!?

Wait a minute is it ringing?

(from the phone which has been knocked to the floor)
*hello. hello? anyone there?*

Me: Sorry about that, my cat has been using the phone again.

person on phone (pop): No seriously, who is this?

Me: Honestly, no one you know.

pop: Then why did you call me?

Me: I didn't, my cat did.

pop: No seriously.

Me: Seriously. My cat dialed the phone, I just picked it up.

pop: Oh come on! You really expect me to believe your cat called me?

Me: Believe me or not, it's still the truth. Don't worry I'll give him a stern talking to and lock the phone in the desk drawer from now on.

pop: But why did you call me?

Me:  This is the sound of me hanging up on you now.

*click*


I'd write a book about Panda, but I'd have to market it as fiction since no one would believe any of this. Heck I'm not sure I believe it, and I experienced it!

Picture of the evil genius:

Comments

[lurkingcat]

Oh, that is awesome!

Fortunately both of mine are asleep at the moment because I really wouldn't want them to see this and get ideas :)

[azurehart]

Yeah the last thing we need is for two or more of the fuzzy genius's to get together and start swapping ideas. I'm just hoping that when Panda finally becomes our Supreme Overlord that he will remember that I kept him in the good kibble and provided a endless supply of fuzzy mice.

[lurkingcat]

It's a running joke in our household that the ice cream van that comes down our road at odd times of day and in the most inclement weather is actually delivering parts for the giant robot that Shadow is secretly building in the cellar. We're just feeding him his biscuits and hoping that he still needs human slaves when it's finished ;)

[azurehart]

With Panda, not only does he use the phone, but he has also been known to run a Google search on the computer (for asdfks;d), and will use the TV remote to switch the channels. He seems especially fond of the Home Shopping Network and Mythbusters

The running joke here is that he is getting ideas for his death ray from the Mythbusters, then looking for the parts on the internet and HSN. The scariest thing is he isn't even my smartest cat. Since they out number me 3 to 1 I try to stay on their good side at all times.

[medie]

dear god, if mine ever figures out how to use the phone, I'm finished.

[azurehart]

We live in fear of trying to explain to the phone company that enormous phone bill is due to our cat making long-distance calls.

[medie]

Oh god, now there's a conversation! Of course, being the phone company they'd be insistent that the cat's an adult member of the household.

[azurehart]

Panda is only 1. Even given that a cat's lifespan is shorter and that they are said to age faster than humans, he won't be legally an adult until he's at least 3. Sad that I've actually given it that much thought, but with Panda's fascination with electronics, Selena's ability to open doors, and Homeboy's fondness for chasing the neighbors German Sheppard, I try to be prepared for any possible argument.

[weaverbird]

AHAHA! This is priceless! And I feel your pain. One of my cats took over an IM window I carelessly left open and confused the daylights out of the person on other end. And another one was messing with my Casio keyboard and actually managed to record her noodling before I caught her. Feline Overlords FTW!

[azurehart]

I don't know if should be reassuring or scary that other people's cats also know how to use the computer and other electronics. I think I'm going to go for scary.

[weaverbird]

Oh, I think those of us who have good records as Feline Support Staff needn't worry. The folks who talk loudly about how dogs rock and cats suck? Now, come the revolution, they might be in a bit of trouble. :))

[azurehart]

Here we are well aware that the dominate species is not human, and that our only purpose is to wait on our Feline Masters. The head of the house is our 17-year-old cat Salena, and she rules the house with an iron paw.

[weaverbird]

Hee! Oh yes, the older they get, the more autocratic. Cleo was 17 and a half when he passed, and he had long been the Boss of All.